Tuesday, November 2, 2010

"If You Really Knew Me" Part 2: Note-to-Self (-Doubt)

NaBloPoMo - Day 2!  
(How's THAT for momentum?)

Speaking of momentum, I realize that a "series" of blog posts is quite possibly the most effective if less than two months pass between posts.  I get that.  What can I say?  It is what it is, my friends.  Meh.

Credit Limit

So.  Let's just say that if I had a nickel for every time I have heard, "You really need to give yourself more credit," I would probably be able to retire at the ripe old age of 32 (yikes...2 months from now).  The words "not good enough"seem to have been permanently tattooed on the back of my brain, and I believe their harsh significance, despite how often people tell me, "Chrissy, you are such a positive and creative person."

Why, thank you, random compliment-givers.  I try my best to be positive.  And I feel the need to be creative to compensate for not quite measuring up.  Case in point:  my teaching career.  I spent two years of my life as a full-time graduate student at UC Denver for elementary education.  I completed my student teaching.  I completed ALMOST all of my required coursework for my teaching license.  Almost.  Almost.  almost.

The word "almost" has become the yin to my self-doubt's yang.  The pod for its peas.  The dark night to MY bright, shiny day.

Since there are 28 more NaBloPoMo days to go, I'll save my explanation on how I've been working toward turning my "almost" moments to "always" triumphs for future November posts.  Stay tuned...

Extra Credit

In an attempt at giving myself props, I'll give myself credit for my note-to-self in Part 1 of "If You Really Knew Me."  In true Chrissy fashion, when I sat down to write this post, I couldn't quite remember what I wanted to focus on in Part 2.  So...I referenced Part 1 and there it was, plain as day.  "Note-to-self (-doubt)".  Great work, Mrs. Richter.  You know yourself well enough to give yourself blatant reminders in an attempt to stay on track.  Numerous other parts of my life might seem completely off-track at the moment (who am I kidding...ALWAYS), but Part 2 of this series?




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