Floating Right Along

It's been a while...

I've missed you! I've missed my blogging friends and I've really, really missed writing.

I've just been drifting through my days, taking in all that life has presented lately. I've been going through the motions, getting used to my new class of 4-year-olds, settling into my 2-job work schedule and drinking way, way, way too much caffeine.

I recently found out that I was accepted to Colorado University at Denver for graduate school and will begin work on my Master's in Early Childhood Education in mid-January. I'm excited, nervous, stressed out and eager to begin!

Mark and I also finally have our wedding date -- July 12, 2008 at The Denver Botanic Gardens. It's real now...it's official! We've yet to begin planning, but at least we have our location and date.

And Mark turned 30 on "Marktober" 14th, and I pulled off a surprise party for him at our house. He was truly surprised, and we all watched the Rockies win together in our living room. I think he really enjoyed himself.


Speaking of the Rockies, I had to walk awway from the game tonight against Boston. WOW. What an ass-kicking. I hope the Rox can turn it around! YIKES!

And you won't BEE-lieve... our house has been infested with yellow jackets or wasps for the past week and a half. They got into our walls somehow and built a nest. Every day we kill about 20 - 30 of them in our kitchen, dining room and living room. Frankly, I'm sick of them! Who knew I'd be such a good bee killer... At least they're not aggressive. They're pretty much in slow motion since it's been kind of chilly, but I've literally got the heebie geebies. YUCK!

On a more serious note, I'm in the process of trying to figure out who I am -- who I've become since I moved to Colorado. There's been so much progress and forward movement that I'm loosing sight of who I was and who I now should be. It's putting a strain on my relationship, and frankly, I'm very confused.

Shouldn't an engagement and upcoming wedding equate to a blissful time? Exactly how happy should I try to be when I'm working too much and falling behind in certain areas of my life? How do I accept my new role and move on with my life, without loosing sight of bubbly, creative, carefree Chicago Chrissy?

I'm in the process of searching for these answers, or at least trying to find the courage to come to terms with the new me. Mark and I have decided to make a conscious effort to understand each other better and be more connected, happy partners for each other.

But the road seems really long right now, and hopefully I can find the support that I need to get to know myself better and face some difficult issues that I've been surpressing. I'm scared and worried, but hopeful that I can move past the barriers that have been blocking me and discover a clear, peaceful beginning.

Until then, as always, I'll continue to drift along. I hope all is well with you!
Much love
DTL

Sink or Swim

Lately, I haven't been doing a good job of skimming the surface. I've been feeling like I'm sinking a bit, actually.

SINK, SANK, SUNK.

I recently passed the one year mark of living in Colorado, and that's been a little hard for me. Perhaps the realization that Denver really is my home now and the pressures of the new identity that my new life presents are silently wearing on me. Among other things...

I'm still going through the emotions of leaving friends and family in Chicago, but now, since I've been here long enough, I'm now loosing friends in Colorado as well. One of my best friends in Denver, J. R., is moving back to Florida in one week. It's hitting me pretty hard. Not to mention my other good friend K. N. from my girls group who had to head back to Houston. And now my most favorite co-worker, M. S., is leaving work next week to have her baby and not return to work (lucky girl!). I know she'll still be around, but with my schedule lately, I know it will be tough to schedule visits with her. I have a tough time with change...can you tell?

There's a few other little things that have been wearing me down and causing me to sink, but I'll work them out and find my way to the surface soon. I always do. I flip my leaf over and hold on for the ride...

ON THE UP AND UP

Mark and I had the chance to see his parents for a day last weekend in Avon, near Vail. We went to Oktoberfest in Vail and I bought a silver necklace with a tiny little leaf pendant. I've been wearing it for motivation, and when my kids at school ask about it, I explain the whole "starting over" process and I think a few of them may even understand! As silly as it sounds, I rub it between my fingers when I need a little help...

Well I finished my grad school application and sent it off! $40 at Fed Ex later... Ugh. The written statement was a challenge, but I feel like I did a fairly good job selling myself. We shall see... At least it's finished!

I want you to know that if you're a blogging friend of mine, I have been reading your blogs. I just haven't had a chance to comment, but I'll try to soon. Lisa, Kelli, Jill, Jenn, Melanie, etc.

I'll be back soon. Stay tuned. Thanks for reading when you get the chance!
Much love,
DTL

Penny For Your Thoughts?

If I ever encounter extra pennies to share, I'll send them your way.

In the meantime, does anyone have any suggestions on how to attract more blog readers? I try to post comments on other people's blogs, and also link to their blog from mine. I also read the little write-up on Blogger about the settings that I need to turn on, and I think I did it all.

Anyway, I'm only averaging about 12 readers per day. Am I just being too impatient, considering I just started blogging in April? Should I be writing about more interesting topics? (he he...what could be more interesting than ME?) :-)

Any tips would be helpful...

And THANKS so much for reading!

DTL

I want it back!

Let it fly in the breeze
And get caught in the trees
Give a home to the fleas in my hair
A home for fleas
A hive for bees
A nest for birds
There ain't no words
For the beauty, the splendor, the wonder
Of my...

Hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair
Flow it, show it
Long as God can grow it
My hair

I want it long, straight, curly, fuzzy
Snaggy, shaggy, ratty, matty
Oily, greasy, fleecy
Shining, gleaming, streaming
Flaxen, waxen
Knotted, polka-dotted
Twisted, beaded, braided
Powdered, flowered, and confettied
Bangled, tangled, spangled, and spaghettied!

Oh say can you see
My eyes if you can
Then my hair's too short...



P.S.
I'm aware that patience is a virtue, but I want my long hair back NOW. The kicker -- I'm almost ready to stick my finger in a socket because my curls are gone now too. How the heck did that happen? They were natural...where the heck did they GO?

Ugh. (By the way, my friends have always said I have "anorrexia of the hair." Never happy with it, even when there's nothing wrong with it.) Regardless, I need six inches ASAP.

:-)

Skimming the Surface Beats Sinking Any Day

Lately I'm realizing that even if I don't have the time to make something perfect, it's still worth a shot to do the best that I can, even if it's a bit rushed. At this point, doing just a little bit of what I want or need to do is better than not doing it at all.

First example -- working out. Since I had to quit marathon training a few months ago, I haven't really done anything in the way of exercise. Nada. It depresses me knowing that I won't get back to the fitness level that reached in June. But as a result, I'm not toned anymore. I'm "soft." And I don't like it. I think I will set a goal to run about 20 minutes once a week. That doesn't seem so bad. And hey, it's better than nothing, right? Skimming, not sinking.

Example number two -- Blogging. I'm averaging about 5 creative ideas for blogs per day. But it's hard to pick one, dive right in and flesh it out each day because I want the blog to showcase my creative abilities and I want the post to be really good. But I'm learning to get over the notion that every post of mine will be ground-breaking (an over-exaggeration) and I'll just get out what I can. This blog is a perfect example of a not-so-perfect post (have you noticed the lack of well-thought-out points and poor grammar? Yeah, that's what I'm talking about...

Final example -- cooking. Lately I've been working really hard at coming up with creative meals. Like instead of butter on my corn on the cob, I've felt the need to do things like mix the butter with a little lemon juice and seasoned salt for a little somthing extra. But darn it, cooking is time-consuming, and it's not the end of the world if I reach for an old-standby. Tonight, I let it go, and I just plain buttered my corn.

So, here's another attempt at skimming the surface, instead of just sinking (sinking, in this case, would be not writing about these 2 events at all). Granted, I'd love to blast my blog readers (all three of you) right out of the water with poetic descriptions. Instead, I need to get to bed, so I'll make it easy:

1. My friend Pamela in Chicago is going through a tough time. Someday I will dedicate a blog to her so you can get to know how great she is. Anyway, her family is going through a tragic event and I'll be thinking about her. She's very special to me, so even though you don't know her, please keep her in your thoughts!

2. My Happy Friend Jess turned 33 last week! Seriously, she looks 23... Anyway, when I get a chance I'll write a nice blog about the CL girls (my Denver girlfriends!), and how we had such an incredibly fun girls night this past Friday for Jess's birthday! I'll even post pictures. Seriously, so much fun!

So there. Two quick little ditties about events / people in my life that I wanted to flesh out, but just don't have the drive at this late hour. Skimming the surface = more productive in the long run. I hope!

Good night, all. Thanks for being my "floaties." With you around my arms, I'll never sink!